Book Worm Meme: The Myth of Monogamy

I’ve been tagged with the Bookworm Meme by Maria of "Writings of Maria". Thanks, Maria! You just gave me a reason to share with everyone this wonderful book.

Here’s how this meme works:

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 56.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next two to five sentences.
5. Don’t dig for your favorite book, the cool book or the intellectual one. Pick the Closest.
6. Tag five people to do the same.

MY BOOKWORM MEME

For a "married" male to engage in out-of-pair heterosexual sex, his EPC partner must in turn be (1) seduce, (2) coerced, (3) a willing co-participant, or (4) an active initiator. ... We'll find that all patterns occur, in animals as well as human beings.

THE MYTH OF MONOGAMY: Fidelity and Infidelity in Animals and People by David P. Barash, PH.D., and Judith Eve Lipton, M.D.

I bought this book after watching Penn and Teller's show, Bullshit! The episode's topic was "The Business of Love". Several experts on love were interviewed, including authors of my favorite books, "The Rules" and "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus".

The only book featured in the show that I haven't read was "The Myth of Monogamy". I had to get my own copy immediately! For a household manager like me, it is important that I am kept abreast of research on home topics such as Romance and (In)Fidelity.

It was a funny and informative read. Here are some of my favorite quotes:

"Unattractive males guard their mates more closely."
(The uglier the guy, the more more jealous he'll be.)

"Males who remained monogamous when they apparently had the opportunity to attract a second or third female were those mated to unusually aggressive females. (This aggression, incidentally, was directed toward the potentially home-wrecking females, not toward the male.)"
(I'll be watching "No Retreat... No Surrender... Si Kumander" for a few tips.)

"In territorial species, a female generally chooses a male based on the quality of his territory. ... By getting a resource rich male, a female also gets the best genes. But this need not always be true. If a male who is genetically subpar ends up with a high-quality piece of real estate, he may also end up with a female who looks elsewhere when it comes to a sexual partner."
(Gold-diggers are bad news. "You've got to love me for what I am, for simply being me...")

It must be noted that Dr. Barash and Dr. Lipton were talking about the mating habits of birds and not humans. I never knew birds live an exciting life.

Despite all the examples of infidelity in the animal kingdom presented by the authors, they ended the book with a positive note.

"By establishing a durable, long-term relationship with someone who not only cares, but also shares an expanding history, who understands one's strengths, weaknesses joys and despairs, the successful monogamist assures himself and herself a companion for life, long after the children (if any) have grown, when work is no longer an option, when even sex may be mostly a memory, at just the time when two devoted people can keep track of the doctor appointments, change each other's senior diapers, and sit together, watching the sunset."

Sigh... *googly eyes*

I wonder where my husband is right now. Time for some mate-guarding.